Tag Archives: satire

Stadium Defense Squad: Cadet Journal, Day 37

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The following excerpt is from the journal of a new recruit in the Stadium Defense Squad. This elite team of dedicated students is sworn to protect one WSU’s most hallowed landmarks from the hordes of the undead.

Today’s practice was pretty demanding, I don’t know if I’m going to make the cut. Our drill instructor is brutal! I mean, I ran up four flights of stairs, took out three zombies, and all he gives me is “I’ve seen enough.” Uh! How will I ever defend our turf from the undead if my own drill instructor doesn’t think I can do it? Well, I’ll show him diary! Just wait till tomorrow’s practice. I hear we’re starting close quarters combat soon…

Stay tuned for more student vs. zombie action

Think you’ve got what it takes for zombie black ops? send in your application.

Stadium Defense Squad: Now accepting applications

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Zombie black ops are routine for the Stadium Defense Squad

Zombie black ops are routine for the Stadium Defense Squad

Defend this house!

Even though the zombie apocalypse is still years (if not decades) away, the Stadium Defense Squad remains vigilant in preparing to defend some of the most hallowed ground on campus.  The squad enforces a rigorous selection process, specialized black ops training and the latest undead countermeasures to ensure that the stadium will remain a proud centerpiece for generations.

Looking for some student vs zombie action?

If you are interested in joining the Stadium Defense Squad, please take a moment to fill out the application below. Our selection committee will closely review your information, compare notes with our stealth surveillance teams, and you’ll be informed of our decision in a clear but decisive manner in a few weeks.

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